T.G.I.Manson

Freedom

USA imposes sanctions on Libya. I rejoice.

North Korea threatens to shoot at the South should they continue dropping leaflets about protests in Egypt via baloons.

So the people there have never heard the news?


What's the difference between propaganda and truth?

The toughest week in my year

It's very easy to drive a method actor insane.

Just ask him to play 2 roles.

-:-

Every time I hear of what's happening in Libya, I cry.

-:-

It has been the busiest week in my entire year thus far.

I'm fighting a war with a lack of sleep.

In times like this when time is short and everything seems to be just about to fall apart, I had to do something to keep my sanity.

So when I had no time for anything, I did something that I have no time to do.

Because I need that touch of humanity. I need to not be stuck in doing things, and feeling emotions that are scripted by someone else.

So I spent the whole of today making this:



-:-

Please, pray for me.

-:-

I had a dream last night that made me so uncomfortable.

I know there are things I hide even from myself.

I shun it coz I don't dare to face even the thoughts of it.

But they are coming up out of my subconscious when I'm asleep.

It hits me when I'm down.

-:-

Avril Lavinge is divorced.

Justin Bieber celebrates his birthday on Tuesday.

Night off

I finished rehearsals early so I thought, why not stop by plaza singapura for a quick dinner?

Since I was having dinner, I thought, why not go visit Caesar's, my favourite shop.

Since I was on the way to Caesar's, why not stop at the Lego shop too.

Since I was at the lego shop, and they had what I wanted at a low price, why not buy it?


I got more change than I expected. They were having a 20% storewide sale.

Oh my goodness. KEEP ME AWAY FROM THIS PLACE!!!


Since they were having a storewide sale, why not buy more!

I considered buying this...

I had wanted something like this since I was a kid.

But in the end decided not to.

I find more joy spending $70 on things that will make 10 different people happy rather than buying one thing that will make only me happy.

Since I find more joy in giving small gifts to people than big gifts to myself, I thought, why not go to Daiso?

And since everything in Daiso was so cheap, I bought so many things!

I finally reached the top floor where Caesars was on, and my back and calves hurt.

Since I was so close, I might as well visit the other toy shops along the way too!

And since I spent so much time elsewhere, by the time I got to Caesars, it was closed.


Since when did I ever take a short detour?


But it was not in vain. In Daiso, at the most unlikely of times and places, I helped a pair of girls take down a packet of lolly pops located high above their reach.

Yes, for that random tiny act of awesomeness, the night was worth it.

Now back to my pull-ups.

How I felt yesterday...

If I were a boy...

To be honest, I relate more to the guy in the first part of the video than the second.

I'm not sure what that says about me...

Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless.

I feel like throwing furniture.

Song of Solomon 7

¹ How beautiful your sandaled feet, 

   O prince’s daughter!
Your graceful legs are like jewels,
   the work of an artist’s hands. 

² Your navel is a rounded goblet
   that never lacks blended wine.
Your waist is a mound of wheat
   encircled by lilies. 

³ Your breasts are like two fawns,
   like twin fawns of a gazelle. 

⁴ Your neck is like an ivory tower.
Your eyes are the pools of Heshbon
   by the gate of Bath Rabbim.
Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon
   looking toward Damascus. 

⁵ Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel.
   Your hair is like royal tapestry;
   the king is held captive by its tresses. 

⁶ How beautiful you are and how pleasing,
   my love, with your delights! 

⁷ Your stature is like that of the palm,
   and your breasts like clusters of fruit. 

⁸ I said, “I will climb the palm tree;
   I will take hold of its fruit.”
May your breasts be like clusters of grapes on the vine,
   the fragrance of your breath like apples,
 ⁹ and your mouth like the best wine.

   She

   May the wine go straight to my beloved,
   flowing gently over lips and teeth.
¹⁰ I belong to my beloved,
   and his desire is for me. 

¹¹ Come, my beloved, let us go to the countryside,
   let us spend the night in the villages. 

¹² Let us go early to the vineyards
   to see if the vines have budded,
if their blossoms have opened,
   and if the pomegranates are in bloom—
   there I will give you my love. 

¹³ The mandrakes send out their fragrance,
   and at our door is every delicacy,
both new and old,
   that I have stored up for you, my beloved.

-:-

If it was up to me, I would not have put this in the Bible. 

But who am I to be more conservative than God?

Insecurities

Holly

I was leaving Browhaus when I saw the picture of her.

Of course she caught my eye.

And it wasn't her long hair, sharp chin or smile that caught my attention.


Okay maybe it was.

But that's not what held my attention.

This was:

Her tattoo saying "protège-moi de mes désirs" which means "protect me from what I want" in English was what made me stop and stare.

Indie.

Uncanny

I was at Holland V after getting my eyebrows threaded.

I saw Hilda as I headed up the escalator.

I smsed her to tell her I saw her in Holland V.

I went to Holland Road Shopping Centre to look around.

Hilda replied.

I twitted:.

I got a call from Ziwei asking if I was at Holland V from my status.

I went to the shop she was working at to help her.

Her shoes had broken and she needed someone to watch the stall while she bought new shoes, so I lent her mine and sat down in the shop selling dresses.

A girl in Browhaus uniform walked by.

She looked at the dresses
She looked at me
She saw my threaded brows
She saw my feet had no shoes on
She saw the broken pair of heels in front of me

She giggled

She walked on.

Ah... these are moments to live for.


After that I got a call from dad telling me where he'll pick me.

Before I could hang up, Adele walked by and waved.

Then walking out of Holland V, an older woman missed a step and fell right in front of me.

I went forward to help her up, saying, "Are you okay auntie?"

She turned her head to thank me, only then did I realise she was caucasian.

I helped her up, finding it weird to call he auntie.

I looked up and at the entrance of Cold Storage and saw a girl my age- Jocelyn if I remember right, my classmate from primary school whom I had not seen since primary school, supporting an old lady out of the supermarket.


Today was a strange day.

This video contains EXTREMELY GRAPHIC VIOLENCE.

Bahrain’s army deliberately kills peaceful protesters with live rounds ( automatic weapon ).The camera-person and the crowd they are with are shot at, the rattle of gunfire suddenly echoing throughout the street around 3:50. As the camera turns, it fixes on the corpses of some of the protesters; you get a clear view of exactly what happened to one of them, and it is terrible. Protesters haul the bodies of their friends back across the street; there is screaming, there are invocations of God, there is blood, there is vomiting in the background. The streets lies in utter chaos.


Don’t watch this video if you can’t handle that.


If you can take it, watch this video, and cry with me.





This cannot be ignored.

I suddenly feel musical

If my blog reflects my life somewhat, or at least what is going on in my head, I should include music too.

I'm going to start posting music now and then.

I notice things

Did anyone realise that the dagger in "Eragon"...

Looks exactly like the one from V for Vendetta?

No one did?

Oh man... I'm such a nerd.

Ow

The young boys at church were trying to do push ups.

I asked them if they could push off the ground, clap their hands behind their back, and then catch themselves after.

They said that was not possible.


Then they asked if I could do it.


I got down on the floor, then realised it was a little slippery, but it was too late to turn back.

I pushed off the ground, clapped behind my back, and then found my chin had a stronger affinity to the floor than I had expected.

Wham.

Of course the thud was covered by my poker face. I got off the ground, walked off with my head held high as though I was successful, then went to the toilet to show some agony.

Oww.

My chin really hurts now. Abrasion and trauma and some serious bruising.

Pray for recovery.

Mondays are really worth waiting for

Sorry about last week's technical failure.

It's SuperManson to the rescue.

How uncanny the theatre is

When I told my friends I got through the dramatic reading audition, one commented that it was no surprise- "You're so drama."

It actually turned out to be a problem when I did a realism play. I was asked to act normal, but my definition of normal was theatrical- I'm quite over the top in real life.

Take for example when we were asked to look at how each other's normal way of walking. We were told, one by one, to walk to the end of the floor and back. I walked up and down normally, and all of the cast said I looked like I was walking like a model on a runway.

Oh dear.

I usually do walk like that.


And so life on stage thus became more realistic than life offstage.

Which lead to a strange slight sense of the uncanny.

But that was not the sad part.

Today, we finished running through all our lines for one of the plays for the very first time. 

Yup. 99 pages. Under our belt for the first time.

Wow.

Yet I felt a sense of tragedy.

To me, the greatest tragedy in theatrical performance... "is that after all the development our characters have experienced, and the things they have gone through and grew through together, I find that in our professionalism, we have no real character development together as real persons. 


So while I've worked with you for weeks and spent so much time in such close proximity with you, I find it tragic to realise... I don't know you... At all."




11 days to performance.

This blog

Someone noted that I no longer talk about marriage in real life the way I used to.

That is true, although I spam a lot about it here on my blog.




Figures. The drives and desires have to have an outlet right?

Yeah.

But you know what that means?


Simply put...

When I have a serious girlfriend, and a wife...


This blog will die.


(But fret not though my loyal readers, it might well be resurrected once Manson Hui comes along...)

Aww man...

Things get messy

My liberation as a man is tied to your liberation as a woman

I won't pull punches

Today, we watched this at the start of our gender studies class.

It was painful to watch what we are doing to ourselves.

To our women, to our men.

It hurt.

I was so troubled watching this video that I penned down a note saying "You are Beautiful, no matter what they say" and gave it to the girl sitting beside me.

Minor in Gender

In the course of completing my gender studies minor, I've graduated from writing about small topics like womens' breasts to bigger topics like comic book superheroines' bodies.

Here's what I watched for an online discussion for my course today.

Punggol

Area P- Jurassic Park.

I blew up over 50 balloons in an hour.

I wrote this for you

Valentine's Day

Lunch. With 2 Iranians and a Nepali.

Some of the best looking guys in NUS.

And thus began my very long day.

I gave hand-made gifts to Stephie, Janice, Samantha, Pamela, Jing Wen, Florence, Celeste, Valerie, Yaya, Sonia, Devi, Li Yun, Kellynn, Kimberly, Ricardo, Ricardo's friend, Dylan, Neha, Hui Ze, Ikeya, Constance, Emily, PH, Seth, Hong Ling...

All in all, I gave out about 40 gifts this Valentine's day. Some of which were given to girls I met for the first time only today.


Now...
To those whom I gave balloon sculptures, please keep them out of the sun.
To those whom I gave sunflowers, please keep them in water and in the sun.
To those I gave sweets, please keep them out of water and out of the sun.



And after all that time and money and effort, I walked down a lonely road with the cool wind blowing on my face, and had a quiet dinner in school... alone.

Heh.

Ecclesiastes 2:11

¹¹ Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done
   and what I had toiled to achieve,
everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;
   nothing was gained under the sun.

Don't worry, I was not emo. I chose to have dinner alone.


The day was done, the gifts were given, the girls (and a few boys) were left smiling. Whether they were single or attached, alone, with someone special or in groups, I approached them and gave each of them something special today.

Yeah, many people in school had flowers, but my friends had bigger ones.
Many people carried gifts, but only my friends had hand-made balloon sculptures.


I enjoyed the day so much and was glad and relieved at the end of it. The sun was setting; I had given all I could give to the world. I felt so drained. I felt so satisfied.


"Oh Lord, thank you for today. It's finally done, and I miss you."

As the words left my mouth, a gentle wind picked up and the leaves rustled past my feet. It was like his gentle assurance telling me that he was listening, and he was with me. I smiled.



As I ate a lousy-tasting dinner in his presence, I smiled at all that had happened today. I thanked God for making today so special. The canteen was quieter now, and the few souls left in school didn't seem to notice as I began making one last balloon sculpture. Twisting it into shape, I returned my tray and walked up to the one lady I had wanted to give a gift to since the start of the day.


She was the cleaning auntie at the Deck, and she was very pleased with the gift.



And you know what, so was I.

Ecclesiastes 5:19-20

¹⁹ Moreover, when God gives someone wealth and possessions, and the ability to enjoy them, to accept their lot and be happy in their toil—this is a gift of God. ²⁰ They seldom reflect on the days of their life, because God keeps them occupied with gladness of heart.

Working so hard

Getting so tired.

Is all this effort worth it?

Bruno Mars

Baby I'll run through the rain for you
yeah, yeah, yeah
I'll run through the rain for you
yeah, yeah, yeah
Baby I'll do anything for you
yeah, yeah, yeah
I'll even run through the rain for you
yeah, yeah, yeah...


I will go through all this pain...
I will run, right, through, the rain...
Baby I'll run for you baby...


But you won't do the same...


Drenched from the downpour yesterday, but I did it coz Monday is Valentine's Day and there was something I needed to buy for you



(and for you and for you).

Virtual Haircut

Put on headphones, close your eyes, and listen to this.



It's almost as though someone's behind you giving you a haircut.

I wanted to Vlog today, but I'm shy. Here's the script instead

She   I’m tired.

Man (gently) Don’t think anymore. 

She      I’m tired and cranky. My brain keeps running.

-Scene 12, SUPERMARKET, by Chen Yinxuan


I slept late last night. I was frustrated at how little sleep I was getting. I had a long day ahead today. I slept on the floor so I would be able to wake.

I woke and sat on the floor for a long while with my blanket over my head. And I prayed. I told God that I could not wait till the day was done, but I did not want that to stop me from living the day to its fullest for his glory.

I got on the LRT in Punggol at peak hour.

The MRT was a different story.

On the train (I had so thankfully secured the last available seat in Punggol- SengKang people take the train up to Punggol so they can have a seat), I was quietly reading my Bible when this old man came and stood in front of me. 2 verses down and I was already feeling so guilty I had to get up. So I kept my Bible, picked up all my fencing gear and bags and stood up.

The old man was about to take my seat in the crowded peak hour train when he asked, "Young man, are you getting down?"

I said no, and he did not want to take my seat. I insisted, so he had no choice.

A few stops down and the seat next to him was vacated so I sat down and read my Chinese Bible next to him. Then I started conversation with this old man. He was going to work. Said studying is a good time. Money is bad. I said no, the love of money is what's bad.

-$-

In school, and class went better than I expected. In fact, I had so much fun today. 2 gender studies classes, followed by an epic lunch.

First, I entered the canteen alone.

Then, I spotted Cheryl Goh walking through very fast.

I gave chase.

Thus I had a lunch date.


To make things better, I could finally redeem my collection of stamps at the Japanese food stall. Collect a stamp each time you eat there, and once you have 10 you get a free meal.

I was so happy. This is my 3rd redemption.

Ziwei, who came by for a while, did not believe there was such a coupon and could not believe that someone actually bothered to collect the stamps. I showed her this picture as evidence (with Cheryl as a witness in it) and Ziwei's response began my day's collection of the darnest things women said to me.

"You were just looking for an excuse to take a picture of a pretty girl right?"

- Ziwei

Good question.

"I now have got a shaved head,you're right its so good."

- Cheryl (via sms)

That left me with questions.

"Justin... don't mind me asking you this question... but are you gay?"

- Florence (from fencing)

That is the question.

"Just... come here... Come closer... Did you buy a pack of engagement rings?"

- Mom

That is also the question.

"Justin, did you buy the 12 engagement rings? You did, didn't you? You did!"

- Rachel Berry

That is your own answer to your question.

"Hey Justin! Wow.. U really have a way of making a girl feel special."

- Dawn (via sms)

That is not a question.


-

I went to the library to look for answers to some of these difficult questions. I think I found the answer to at least one of the questions.

Maybe I should stop shooting myself in the foot.

Maybe you should stop leaving swords on the floor.

Oh Lord, thank you for answering prayer. I can sleep now. 

And I pray tomorrow will be lived to the fullest of your glory.

So what does a degree in Sociology lead to?

Chances

The front seats in the new SBS buses are very narrow.

Heah heah heah! Got chance.

And then recently this was put up:

Sian.

These new signs effectively spoilt my chances of sitting next to a girl my age.

Never mind.

I found another way to increase my chances this Valentines' Day.

Devil and the deep blue sea

Religion and Film lecture.

This was the lecture I cried out to God in because I felt so alone.

Today I came in and sat next to my new friend. Kinda.

Then I noticed a girl in the back row was from my Inequalities module.

I guess I remember her now because she presented on the same topic as I did on Monday.

I said hi. And as I did, Christine walked pass and we were surprised to see each other.

"I didn't know you were taking this module!" She said.

Christine was the writer of the other play I'm acting in and I love her epic script.

"I didn't know YOU were taking this module too!" I responded.

"I'm not," she replied, "I'm a teaching assistant."

(O_O)!!!

Religion lecture was immediately after. 

(Yes, my modules are highly overlapping. I study 2 for the effort of one.)

I was sitting between Yaoqi and a drop-dead gorgeous girl.

The teacher briefed us on the upcoming group project and said we could form our own groups across classes. 

Just after I had asked Yaoqi if he and his friend wanted to work with me, the girl on my left offered me a place in her group with her and all the good looking girls (and guy[s]).

Now I had a choice. Tough one, tough one.

But I was reminded of what happened exactly one week ago today. It involved a situation that made me choose between following either a girl or Yaoqi for lunch, and I did what I thought was right and went with Yaoqi... and was blessed beyond measure.

I told the drop-dead gorgeous girl I can't join her group.

I've written down what happened last week, but I dare not post it because it's too easy to identify the girl I'm talking about from the way I wrote. (As in anyone who reads it will know who she is, even if they do not know who I am. So I shall not post it... just in case.)

But if you want it, drop me a comment. I'll mail it to you.

I was staring at the stars

2 guys approached me in NUS and asked me if i was lost and looking for something.

I didn't tell them I was looking for the 4th star surrounding orion's belt and instead asked them where the nearest toilet was.

This stumped them for a while.

You see, there is no male toilet near the canteen.

They've all been converted to female toilets.


You know, as a rule of thumb, women's toilets should be twice the size of male toilets, not twice as common...

I stop to look at something weird

And take a photo of it.

First Presentation

I left the house without preparing for my oral presentation.

I started preparation by reading my QT book on being a man in the LRT.

Then I read a few chapters of Proverbs on the NEL.

I began writing my script on the SBS.

I drew the links while walking up Kent Ridge.

I made it to the Deck for lunch with Jon Ma.

I showed him my script and he had only one thing to say.

"Good luck."

Red numbers listed points in order, black lines helped me get find the subsequent red number.


I went into class and played the 1st, 5th and last rule.

When the tutor opened the floor for the presenters, I stood up to break the awkward silence. I knew the topic I was presenting on was a common topic that others may have chosen, and thus wanted to be the first to talk about it.

Proverbs 18:17 (New International Version, ©2010)

 ¹⁷ In a lawsuit the first to speak seems right,
   until someone comes forward and cross-examines.

So I presented first and sounded good.

Then without the fear of my stuff being shot down, as it had already passed through the fire, I came forward to cross examine other's arguments fearlessly.

Lalala. Good class. Nailed it. Sounded wise.


Much thanks to Jon Ma and Yao Qi for their input!


And since I'm in such a good mood, I shall give you a preview of one of the plays I'm going to be in. This one is an excerpt from SUPERMARKET.

She:   Can't tell?

Man:  Nope. First presentation?

She:   Yes. 

Holy Water

:)

My dream last night

She was tall and fair, in a flowing white dress, as stunning as can be. But the dress was stained with blood and she was lying on the road. She had just been given a fatal blow from a long and ornate curved blade (like the one in Vampire Hunter D, but with some red in the handle).

I ran up to her and rested her head on my arm. She started having spasms and was about to die. I removed the blood stained blade and put it on my other side, away from her. I realised that in doing so, people passing by might think I was the one who stabbed her, but I did not care. I tried to make her as comfortable as possible and straightened her skirt to cover her long legs in modesty.

I caught a glimpse of the face of this most beautiful girl I had never seen before. I held on to her tightly, and in my arms she died.

(Woah. My nose started bleeding when I wrote this. My nose never bleeds.)

I missed you today

And you and you and you.

All in the name of art.


Please come watch me perform k? Let me feel that missing time with all of you church friends for rehearsals was worth it.

I have good news

Days have been dark and gloomy...

But it gets better.

Actually it's not like it's very bad here.

It's just that we have nothing better to talk about.

Friday's Video Meets April's Fool

(I meant to post this on April 1st... but made a mistake. By the time I withdrew it, too many had seen it already. So here it is again.

Just so you know, I've scheduled posts till March already so if I stop blogging today, this blog will keep updating itself till March.)

More on Chuck Norris

Is there anything this man cannot do?

CNY

The most awesome moment of today was when one of my relatives gave me an ang pow and proceeded to put one in Rachel's hands too.

This aunty suddenly stopped with a perplexed expression on her face, after she had given the red packet, and looked to her husband.

"That's not Marianne right?" she asked in a rather confused tone.


Dear Marianne, just for your information, I did not manage to collect many hong baos on your behalf. Our relatives believed you changed so much after a few months in Africa that they could assume Rachel was you.

But then again, everyone makes mistakes right?

You're very missed.

Sinema Old School

Theatre Work

The first time I met her I was blown away by her acting skills.

The second time we met I was lying on her lap.

Ah... the joys of theatre work.


I am playing the lead role in 2 chamber readings this March.

One role has me falling for a girl 10 years older.

The other has me falling for a girl almost 10 years younger.

I'm exploring the depths of my imagination to play both roles.


Oh and the only girl I get to kiss is my "daughter".

She's supposed to be 6, but played by a girl almost my age.

Ah... the joys of theatre work.

Oh crap...

I... yesterday I did something... I accidentally... argh.

I'm such a hypocrite.

Maybe what I say is my stand is what I hope to believe in, not what I'm ready stand for.

My Room

I finally achieved what I wanted to do with my room.

I got all the mess on the floor stuck on the table/walls/door.

Alright... Now what? I can't stand the sight of my room.

Spicy food can make your nose run because of a chemical that irritates your mucus membranes.

This chemical is called capsaicin, and it is found in such foods as hot peppers. It is a strong irritant that can irritate both the mucus membranes of the nose and the tear ducts of a person’s eyes. This is why oftentimes your nose can run and your eyes water while enjoying a spicy meal. Capsaicin can also dilate blood vessels, which is why people also tend to turn red in the face!

-OMG Facts

So tell me, why in the world do people like chilli?