I wrote this on the 5th day

I didn't want to post this video, but I think I should.

It is simple, well filmed, and captures an emotion perfectly.


They are asian, but have a heavy American accent.

So to give you a head start, the first line said is:

"Did you love him?"




When this video started, I felt as though my heart stopped.

But it was not in the way that my breath was taken away.

No, it was different this time.

It felt like my heart was totally guarded from the emotions that arose.

It was strange to me- I watched it and thought it a nice film, but it did not affect me the way films like this used to.


I've never seen a short film I've liked so much, that I didn't like so much.

This post is not about the film by the way, it's about me.

I noticed something about myself while watching this film.


You see I wrote this blogpost on the 5th day...

the 5th consecutive day that I did not like anyone.

I know it's no big deal to you that I could hold out for 5 days without falling for a girl, even though I tend to be attracted to them easily.

It's not a big thing to me either.

But it's just that this time... I feel different.

I'm... tired.

Of romance, and love, and all that this world tells us to hold dear.


I'm tired.


I wrote this on the 5th day and scheduled it for a distant date in the future.

If I still continue feeling the same way as I did when I wrote this post...

Then today would be day 80.


I wonder if I this feeling will last.

We'll see.