Girls

1 of the 9 girls I was sitting with at lecture today pointed out to me that my blog has been talking about nothing other than girls for the longest time. I didn't realise that.

So in this post I'm not even going to mention the word "girl" or anything female.

Crap. Who am I trying to kid.


Maybe she was right. But I think that's interesting. Because I could change my attitudes, like I changed my stand towards going into a relationship (to not going into one now), but I could not change who I innately was (someone who thought and talked about marriage/relationships/girls alot alot alot).

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Judging from today, my life revolves around a disproportionate number of women. My Gender studies class had 20 girls and 3 boys. I ate lunch with one boy and dinner with 3 girls. I went for Social Psychology lecture with 9 girls and no boys. Now I shall tell you what happened tonight after all this was over and I walked towards the library.


I walked past girl E today. I have not seen her the whole semester.

She was on the phone. She waved, I waved.

She said "C is just ahead."

I walked past E.

I walked towards girl C. I have wanted to see her the whole semester.

I slowed down to think.



How in the world did E know I would want to know C was just ahead???


I slowed down to talk to C.


I left with a bounce in my step.

I stopped at a bench to collect my thoughts.


Why did I like talking to this girl so much?


Then it hit me.

You know how some people seem to be putting their heart into a conversation?

They react to what you say and they smile and move and respond more than normal people would, and you feel very encouraged to continue talking to them and sharing yourself with them.

C was like that. She smiled with not just parted lips- it was almost as if her teeth were parted as well, which was indeed enough to melt any guy. And just that action of a full smile, portrayed a total lack of inhibition- and a whole lot of sincerity.

I smile just thinking of her smile.


Then girl H appeared and sat down with me and I told her about all the girls listed above who I don't really know, and who don't really know me.

H knows me through and through.

We could talk about personal stuff the way kids talk about Ben 10.

We talked till H was moved to tears and then she left.


I stayed there for a while. Just sitting, staring.

I took out a tissue to wipe my face.

H was suddenly next to me again.


People don't communicate in the same way, but people communicate.

Sure H doesn't make me feel suddenly happy the way C does,

but she came back just to study with me.

And that, made me glad till the library closed.